New Blog

Cam and I do enough of this gardening stuff to dedicate a new blog to that purpose - along with other environmental issues or whatever comes up along those lines...

Here's the link:

http://driscollurbanhomestead.blogspot.com/

Enjoy!

Spring Gardens 08

Adi's Prayer

Yesterday as Adi and I were playing around. She's really into role playing, so I was a sick patient and she the doctor. She was using a miniature Orange Crush bottle (remember that stuff? mmmmm goooood) to administer my medicine. But it wasn't enough to just pretend I was drinking medicine from the bottle - Adi wanted me to have the cap and top portion of the neck in my mouth. All of a sudden the doc decided I had enough and ripped the bottle out of my mouth (luckily it's plastic) and conked my teeth on the way out. It wasn't painful, but certainly wasn't pleasant either. That put an end to the medicine game and I did all of the explaining why what she did was dangerous, etc...

At bed time (which has been, let's say... a challenge lately) Adi surprised me with a prayer. For me. For my teeth! Completely unprovoked, Adi said, "God, please bless my mommy's teeth". Then she turned to me and put her hand on my mouth and repeated her prayer as tears rolled down my cheeks. Oh, the glorious joy of being prayed for by my 3 year old daughter. It was phenomenal. I don't think I can really express how stunningly beautiful it was.

Niabi Zoo

Thanks for the Walk

I found this image on flickr.

As I'm digging a little deeper into this vision thing I've found an interesting website that has been helpful with symbolism. It's http://www.christiansymbols.net/

I wanted to dissect the vision a little bit so I might find deeper and greater meaning in the details, I believe that each detail contains great value. All of this stuff is from the website above (highlighting and bolding are my emphasis).



THREE CASKETS – The three caskets brought by the wise men were gold, frankincense and myrrh. Each gift represents one office Jesus held. The gold was for the office of king, frankincense for the office of priest and myrrh for the office of prophet.

GOLD – 1. A symbol of great wealth. 2. Gold symbolizes a person being royalty. 3. It symbolizes Jesus’ kingly office.

HOST – A piece of unleavened bread. It is often flat and round, and can be referred to as a wafer. It is the consecrated bread of the Lord’s Supper (Eucharist). The word “host” comes from the Latin word hostia, meaning “sacrifice.”

BREAD – 1. Bread is the sustenance of life. Jesus Himself said, “I am the bread of life” (John 6:35). Therefore, bread makes an excellent symbol of life. 2. Bread was used at the Last Supper when Jesus broke the bread and said, “This is my body, broken for you…”(Luke 22:19). In this context the bread, usually shown with a chalice or bunch of grapes, represents the Lord’s Supper (Eucharist).



Sphere - I couldn't find any meaningful info online about the symbolism of a sphere (which was the shape of the host) but as I meditated on it while taking a walk this morning I came to understand that a sphere is all encompassing. A sphere is perfect. When I think of Jesus (who is the host and is the bread - and in this case I think is the sphere) among love, grace and joy I think of perfection.

So all of these things put together has helped me find a more meaningful interpretation:

The golden hands holding the golden spherical host represent God's sovereign hands offering me His son, Jesus Christ, the perfect sacrifice. The sustenance of life encompassing all that is good and true and full of love. Everything I need.

In the moments that I feel desperate to get viably pregnant God offers me Jesus. When I feel like a failure as a friend, a wife, or a mom, God offers me Jesus. When I feel burdens weighing heavily on me, God offers me Jesus. As my 'would be' due date of June 6th looms near, God offers me Jesus. Again and again God says, "Here. I have given you the perfect gift. I am here. I see. I have given you my son. Will you accept him?" How can I say no to that?

So I surrender and I accept and I will trust and I will wait. I am here and I hear. Thank you Lord.

Update: Golden Hands

One thing that didn't seem particularly important when I wrote my last post (mostly because I didn't know what it was or what it meant) was the fact that when I saw the vision and thought that it was bread I also knew that it was the "host". That didn't make sense to me because I don't know what a "host" is but after digesting this a bit with my prayer group I am beginning to learn more about it. Remember, I didn't go to church growing up and the Vineyard is very different from most other churches. I don't have much exposure to this stuff, though some of it is familiar.

According to wikipedia: Host (Holy Communion), bread in the Eucharist

I felt like that was an exciting development (for me anyway). As I learn more and process more, I will share more...

Golden Hands

Last night as I was putting Adi to bed I saw a short, simple vision: it looked something like what you see to the right (a Photo Shopped version of my vision). It was hands, in just this posture, holding something round. The vision was golden and looked more like pure gold and metallic than what I've recreated. I sat and pondered it for a moment and then went on to have a horribly difficult time getting Adi to go to sleep and therefore forgot about the image.

So today I'm wondering, what did my vision mean? I actually giggle at the fact that I have no doubt at all of what I saw and though it was short lived that it was real. And I know that I wouldn't be given a vision if it didn't mean something, so what does this mean?

Here are my initial thoughts: at first I thought the round object in the hands was bread. Then I thought, but it's too round. I don't think it's bread. It was round like a sphere, maybe like a globe. I also had a sense of giving/offering/receiving, but also being held and protected. I was searching the internet a bit for info on symbolism but that wasn't very helpful and I wasn't very dedicated to the search. I certainly have more digging to do but thought it was interesting and wanted to share it.

April Showers Bring May Flowers... and Other Cool Stuff Too

Catching Up

I just found these photos that I had forgotten to take off the camera. These are from a couple of weeks ago.

Adi is holding her new cousin Myles Travis Harney (my little brother's baby!) Adi and Myles' big sister Kayley had a blast running up and down the short hall squeeling all the way. It was a bit hard on the ears but soft on the heart :)

Here's Papa with the girls. Miss Kayley and Miss Adi Rose.

Then came the attack:

Check out Papa's face - too funny.

Oh good, he didn't drop her.

It's so much fun to get the cousins together and watch them play. They're getting to the age that they can really interact and, oh how they feed off each others energy. It's amazing.

A Hard Holiday

As I'm surfing my friends blogs this morning I realize that I haven't posted anything for a while. The past week or so has been spent in somewhat of a funk. I'm sure a lot of factors go into that - PMS (period however unwelcome came on Monday) and Mother's Day, though a blessed day is always hard.

I'm so grateful for Adilyn. God was so generous in His blessing when He trusted us to be her parents! I still think that's just amazing, and that she's just amazing. This little girl has changed everything about how I look at life and I'm in awe of God's creation in her. She makes me want to be a better person, to know Jesus more so that our whole family can be founded on the love that Jesus has for all. And my heart sings because I am not just a daughter and a wife but I am also a mother.

I've never known anything in my life more clearly than that I would one day be a mother. Of course that's always looked a little different in my imagination that what it's looking like in reality. The biggest difference is that I only have one child with me here on earth. The others were lost before I even knew their names, before I got a chance to hold them and tell them face to face that I love them. That's the hardest part about Mother's Day for me. Before I ever became a mother I was a woman who had lost a child. It's so hard to find God in that, to find reason in that. So I cling to this:

God made me a mother. I have a beautiful daughter, Adilyn Rose. I will love her, protect her, and teach her about Jesus. I will probably screw up somewhere along the way, but I also know that God is gracious and has a sense of humor, so with any luck I won't screw up too bad. I may be overprotective at times but I'd rather be safe than sorry. And hopefully some day I will be able to give Adi a little brother or sister. The latter part is in God's hands and I trust Him, even though that can be so stinkin hard to do sometimes!

Praise God and thank you Lord, for making me a mommy.